Death, Dying & Funerals
Life is full of light & dark moments; and every shade in between.
You know those moments in life that we all have: fear inducing, uncomfortable and you want to run away BUT that feeling follows you…. We all have ’em, but at the time they feel oh so isolating.
But after a time you can look back and see all the gold that time held; the lessons, perspective shifts & the reminder that we are here for such a short time.
I think that for a lot of people that is what dealing with death looks like.
A person’s death gives us the opportunity to learn from their experiences, and their example.
It truly is the greatest honour to be invited in to this time in a person’s life, or by their family after, to share with them and guide them in the ways I can.
Death, like life, looks different for everyone & there is no one right way to approach it.
- For some people it starts with a phone call after the person has died, to help the family navigate what the next steps in death procedures look like, explain to them that they can spend time with the body at home if they choose to and supporting them to access funeral support services.
- Other times it is talking to the dying person; listening to what they want their celebration of life to look like, hearing how they are navigating dying and the parts of their life they want to tell me about.
- Or it might be coming into a family member’s home, explaining how a funeral ceremony or celebration of life works, giving the family options, letting them share stories and have a moment of respite from their grief; allowing people to return to their favourite memories and share insights they gained from that person’s life.
Whenever you chose to reach out, my role is the same:
My role is to inform you, share options and to try to make the process calm, reflective and meaningful for the people in it.
I have participated in death walker training with Zenith Virago & the Natural Death Care Centre (both of which are excellent resources if you would like to explore death or dying further).
And I bring my own experiences of death & grief with me, to help me navigate this time with you; from a place of care and kindness.
I believe every celebration of life looks different and I am open to helping you create what ever works best for your situtaion.
A traditional funeral.
Something out in nature post cremation.
A big colourful party filled with the person’s favourite things, live music and booze.
Your way is the only right way. And I am up for carrying a Sound System pretty much anywhere for you!
A bit about me & what brought me to death work
I am one of those people who, to be honest, is curious and energized by death.
Now I know this can be hard to talk about, cos it can be uncomfortable & easier to turn away, we all have our own experiences and wounds we are working through around death and dying…
Me too, I am not willing it to come sooner.
And of course I fear losing my loved ones.
But knowing that death is the only certainty in life helps me to appreciate being here. I get perspective from death.
And it is truly the biggest honour to be invited into these moments with people. I learn so much from everyone I meet, and the life of the person who is gone. It helps me to live better. It shapes me, as it does all the people impacted by that loss.
It’s not always easy work, it makes you face things but my gosh, it is rewarding and worth working through what it brings up in the process.
If you want to navigate this process together, I look forward to connecting with you.
Need help creating your celebration or with end of life care?
Experts & Resources
Elizabeth Gilbert shares her struggle in dealing with her partner’s terminal illness and what it taught her about living.
Death in the Afternoon: Our mission is to educate our audience about death in a unique, relatable, and entertaining way; to further open up conversations about death in a death phobic culture. And sometimes (ok, all the time) let things get delightfully bizarre.
Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying by Bronnie Ware
Option B: facing adveristy, building resilience, and fiding joy by Sheryl Sandberg & Adam Grant
The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion
The Intimacy of Death & Dying by Zenith Virago, Claire Leimbach & Trypheyna McShane